33 Five Hargreeves Quotes from 'The Umbrella Academy'

Five Hargreeves is one of the main characters of the superhero television series, "The Umbrella Academy." He is a 50-something-year-old trapped in his 13-year-old body after a malfunction during one of his time-traveling adventures.

"The Umbrella Academy" has grown in popularity since its release on Netflix, becoming one of the highest-streamed shows in its first month in February 2019. The series follows a dysfunctional family of adopted superheroes.

With an elderly man trapped in the body of a teenage boy, the character is well set up to provide some mature and somewhat wise Five Hargreeves quotes.

Five Hargreeves’ quote: "Who cares if Dad messed us up? Are we gonna let that define us?” | Source: youtube.com/Netflix

Five Hargreeves Quotes about His Dad

“Think about it. When has the old man ever been straight with us?” — Five Hargreeves

“He always gave me five stars.” — Five Hargreeves

“No, I saw Dad. He was in his room with someone. He was making some kind of deal. Before you ask, I don't know what the deal was or who it was with. Everything is a blur.” — Five Hargreeves

“Who cares if Dad messed us up? Are we gonna let that define us?” — Five Hargreeves

"Right now, our priority is finding Dad and getting answers, 'cause everything else depends on it." — Five Hargreeves

Five Hargreeves’ quote: “This is officially worse than the apocalypse.” | Source: youtube.com/Netflix

Five Hargreeves Quotes to His Family

“Okay. Enough. It was the booze talking. In the light of day, you're all still deplorable.” — Five Hargreeves

"This is officially worse than the apocalypse." — Five Hargreeves

"If you ever need anything, I'm always here for you. But lie to us again... Viktor, I'll kill you myself." — Five Hargreeves

"Little advice from someone who's been there? Don't do the math. That equation does not exist. There's no "save five Harlans for every two Claires" formula. People like us, we will never save enough lives to make up for the ones that we take." — Five Hargreeves

"Then you'll drown. This is the price of being powerful. Sometimes we step on ants." — Five Hargreeves

Five Hargreeves’ quote: “Wonder if it’s too late to be un-adopted.” | Source: youtube.com/Netflix

"You're very dangerous, Viktor Hargreeves. The decisions you make impact the entire world. So no matter how benevolent they may seem, you don't get to make them alone." — Five Hargreeves

"I don’t think that I’m better than you, Number One. I know I am. I’ve done unimaginable things, things you couldn’t even comprehend. Just to get back here and save you all.” — Five Hargreeves

“Protect me? I don’t need your protection, Diego. Do you have any idea how many people I’ve killed? No. I’m the Four (expletive} Horsemen. The apocalypse is coming.” — Five Hargreeves

"Jesus, Luther, grow up. We’re not kids anymore.” — Five Hargreeves

“Wonder if it’s too late to be un-adopted.” — Five Hargreeves

Five Hargreeves’ quote: “Oh, it's much worse than that. It means you and I... are gonna have to work together.” | Source: youtube.com/Netflix

“News flash, geniuses! It’s not about us! Take a look around. If you hadn’t noticed, there’s no doomsday. There’s no apocalypse. The sun is shining. Birds are doing whatever the hell birds do. That’s all that matters. We’re done messing with time. And I’m officially retired.” — Five Hargreeves

“Can you really call what we had a family? Institute for Snarky Delinquents. And not a good one at that.” — Five Hargreeves

"Oh, it's much worse than that. It means you and I... are gonna have to work together." — Five Hargreeves

"There's no such thing as good guys or bad guys. There's just people, goin' about their lives. But when the world ends, all those people die, including our family. Time changes everything." — Five Hargreeves

Five Hargreeves’ quote: “You know what they call a superhero who works alone and doesn't listen to anybody? A villain.” | Source: youtube.com/Netflix

General Five Hargreeves Quotes

"The universe is disappearing outside. So you can keep rearranging the deck chairs of the Titanic if it makes you feel better. But the fact remains that we are too late." — Five Hargreeves

"You know what they call a superhero who works alone and doesn't listen to anybody? A villain." — Five Hargreeves

"The universe is disappearing outside. So you can keep rearranging the deck chairs of the Titanic if it makes you feel better. But the fact remains that we are too late." — Five Hargreeves

"Little advice from someone who's been there? Don't do the math. That equation does not exist. There's no "save five Harlans for every two Claires" formula. People like us, we will never save enough lives to make up for the ones that we take." — Five Hargreeves

Five Hargreeves’ quote: “It's important?" You have no concept of what's important.” | Source: youtube.com/Netflix

"You know what else is insane? I look like a 13-year-old boy. Klaus talks to the dead, and Luther thinks he’s fooling everybody with that overcoat. Everything about us is insane. It always has been. We didn’t choose this life, we’re just living it.” — Five Hargreeves

"Hate to say I told you so, but…" — Five Hargreeves

"I'm glad my pain amuses you." — Five Hargreeves

"Facing my mortality, Viktor. I don't recommend it." — Five Hargreeves

"It's important?" You have no concept of what's important." — Five Hargreeves

Five Hargreeves’ quote: “You're Alive. That's...Great. Or Possible Horrible” | Source: youtube.com/Netflix

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"I saw something last night that I was not supposed to see.” — Five Hargreeves

"I Cheated Time So Much I Guess I Just Figured I'd Somehow Cheat Death." — Five Hargreeves

"You're Alive. That's...Great. Or Possible Horrible." — Five Hargreeves

"Can You Give That Mannequin Something New To Wear? She Likes Sequins." — Five Hargreeves

"We didn’t Choose This Life, We’re Just Living It." — Five Hargreeves

Five Hargreeves’ quote: “Can you really call what we had a family? Institute for Snarky Delinquents. And not a good one at that.” | Source: youtube.com/Netflix

"The Umbrella Academy" became one of the most popular shows on Netflix as fans have developed a fondness for its characters, among them, the seemingly bossy Five Hargreeves or Number Five.

Through the quotes, one can discern his character to be smart, sarcastic, and somewhat selfish. His relationship with his family is not the only best either. Fans can also pick up character traits from Izzie Stevens on "Grey's Anatomy," played by Katherine Heigl, who eventually parted ways with the show, as did other stars including Eric Dane, Sara Ramirez, Patrick Dempsey among others.