52 Funny 'Breaking Bad' Quotes and Quips from Our Beloved Characters

"Breaking Bad" is considered by man to be the best series of all time. Generally, it is a series that explores dark narratives. But, among it all, many comedic moments leave viewers in stitches. Read 52 of them below.

Walter White is an average middle-class family man. He works as a chemistry teacher at a local high school and a laundromat to provide for this family. White has not lived up to his potential as someone climbing the ladder in the scientific world, leaving him resentful. His demeanor is also passive, allowing people to walk all over him. This is until he is diagnosed with cancer.

Realizing his treatment will direly affect his family's finances, he decides to team up with dropout and low-level drug dealer Jessie Pinkman. With the help of Pinkman, he uses his chemistry knowledge to cook methamphetamines and slowly but indeed begins to make serious money while building up a name for himself in the drug underworld.

White gradually grows power-hungry as his ego expands. He transforms into someone who starts making questionable choices. The audience begins to ask, is White really doing this for his family as he proclaims? Even more so, did he do it for his family in the first place?

While the series explores serious themes, comedic moments provide relief from the show's intensity. Read 52 of them below.

An Image of Walter White, with his quote: “I am the danger...I am the one who knocks!” | Source: Youtube.com/breakingbad

‘Breaking Bad’ Quotes from the Funniest Moments of the Series

“Yeah, Mr. White! Yeah, science!” ― Jesse Pinkman

“Yeah...Magnets!” ― Jesse Pinkman

“I’m A blowfish! Blowfish! Yeah! Blowfishin’ this up!” ― Jesse Pinkman

"We probably have the most unpicky customers in the world." ― Jesse Pinkman

"I got two dudes that turned into raspberry slushie then flushed down my toilet. I can't even take a proper dump in there." ― Jesse Pinkman

An image of Hank Schrader, with his quote: “No, they’re minerals, Jesus Marie!” | Source: Youtube.com/breakingbad

“Scientists love lasers.” ― Saul Goodman

“I’d ask my diaper-wearing granny, but her wheelchair wouldn’t fit in the RV.” ― Jesse Pinkman

"Gatorade me..." ― Jesse Pinkman

“Congratulations, you’ve just left your family a second-hand Subaru.” ― Saul Goodman

An image of Jesse Pinkman, with his quote: "We probably have the most unpicky customers in the world." | Source: Youtube.com/breakingbad

"Is that your fly-saber?" ― Jesse Pinkman

“You add plus a [expletive] to a minus [expletive] and you get, Like, zero [expletive].” ― Jesse Pinkman

“Hey, I’m a civilian! I’m not your lawyer anymore. I’m nobody’s lawyer.” ― Saul Goodman

“Even government doesn’t care that much about quality. You know what is okay to put in hot dogs? Huh? Pig lips...But I say, hey, have at it...'cause I love hot dogs.” ― Jesse Pinkman

“Darth Vader had responsibilities. He was responsible for the Death Star.” ― Badger

An image of Saul Goodman, with his quote: “Congratulations, you’ve just left your family a second-hand Subaru.” | Source: Youtube.com/breakingbad

"I'm thinking 'Operation Breath Mint' every time you and me are on a stakeout together, alright?" ― Hank Schrader

“I once told a woman I was Kevin Costner and it worked because I believed it.” ― Saul Goodman

“It’s the government, Jack.” ― Jesse Pinkman

“No, they’re minerals, Jesus Marie!” ― Hank Schrader

An image of Hank Schrader, with his quote: "I'm thinking 'Operation Breath Mint' every time you and me are on a stakeout together, alright?" | Source: Youtube.com/breakingbad

“When I put everything into quicken, nothing flashed red, so that’s gotta mean it’s ok, right?” ― Skyler White

"That's what the kids call epic fail." ― Saul Goodman

Smartest Quotes from ‘Breaking Bad'

“Well, technically, chemistry is the study of matter. But I prefer to see it as the study of change.” ― Walter White

“I’m not saying it’s not bad. It’s bad. But it could be worse.” ― Saul Goodman

“If you’re committed enough, you can make any story work.” ― Saul Goodman

An Image of Walter White, with his quote: “Well, technically, chemistry is the study of matter. But I prefer to see it as the study of change.” | Source: Youtube.com/breakingbad

“I don’t believe fear to be an effective motivator.” ― Gus Fring

"You need to stop focusing on the darkness behind you. The past is the past. Nothing can change what we’ve done.” ― Walter White

“There is gold in the streets just waiting for someone to come and scoop it up.” ― Walter White

“Never do the same mistake twice.” ― Gus Fring

An image of Saul Goodman, with his quote: “If you’re committed enough, you can make any story work.” | Source: Youtube.com/breakingbad

“I’ve been living with cancer for the better part of a year. Right from the start, it’s a death sentence. That’s what they keep telling me. Well, guess what? Every life comes with a death sentence. So, every few months I come in here for my regular scan knowing full well that one of these times—hell, maybe even today—I’m gonna hear some bad news. But until then, who’s in charge? Me. That’s how I live my life.” ― Walter White

"Just because you shot Jesse James, don’t make you Jesse James.” ― Mike Ehrmantraut

Breaking Bad Iconic Quotes

"You clearly don’t know who you’re talking to, so let me clue you in. I am not in danger, Skyler. I am the danger...I am the one who knocks!” ― Walter White

“Say my name.” ― Walter White

An Image of Walter White, with his quote: “If you don’t know who I am, then maybe your best course would be to tread lightly.” | Source: Youtube.com/breakingbad

“Some straight like you... age what, 60? He’s just gonna break bad?” ― Jesse Pinkman

“And a man, a man provides. And he does it even when he’s not appreciated, respected, or even loved. He simply bears up, and he does it. Because he’s a man.” ― Gus Fring

“If you don’t know who I am, then maybe your best course would be to tread lightly.” ― Walter White

“We flipped a coin, OK? You and me. You and me! Coin flip is sacred!” ― Jesse Pinkman

“I have lived under the threat of death for a year now. And because of that, I’ve made choices.” ― Walter White

An Image of Walter White, with his quote: “Say my name.” | Source: Youtube.com/breakingbad

"Paying my debt with illicit gambling winnings, I don't know. It feels wrong." ― Ted Beneke

“The fun’s over. From here on out, I’m Mr. Low Profile. Just another [expletive] with a job and three pairs of Dockers. If I’m lucky, a month from now, best-case scenario, I’m managing a Cinnabon in Omaha.” ― Saul Goodman

“When you have children, you always have family. They will always be your priority, your responsibility.” ― Gus Fring

Gus Fring’s quote: “I don’t believe fear to be an effective motivator.” | Source: Youtube.com/breakingbad

"Everyone sounds like Meryl Streep with a gun to their head." ― Mike Ehrmantraut

“A guy that clean has to be dirty.” ― Hank Schrader

“The thing is, if you just do stuff and nothing happens, what’s it all mean? What’s the point?” ― Jesse Pinkman

An image of Jesse Pinkman, with his quote: “We flipped a coin, OK? You and me. You and me! Coin flip is sacred!” | Source: Youtube.com/breakingbad

“Sometimes the forbidden fruit tastes the sweetest.” ― Hank Schrader

“I have spent my whole life scared, frightened of things that could happen, might happen, might not happen, fifty years I spent like that.” ― Walter White

“Been thinking about a summer job I used to have marking trees in the woods. Tagging trees is a lot better than chasing monsters.” ― Hank Schrader

An image of Jesse Pinkman, with his quote: “Some straight like you... age what, 60? He’s just gonna break bad?” | Source: Youtube.com/breakingbad

White is played by the revered actor Bryan Cranston, while his right-hand man, Pinkman, is played by Aaron Paul. Cranston has been involved and vocal in the SAG-AFTRA strike. Co-star Paul and other famous individuals such as Florence Pugh, Robert Downey Jr, and Matt Damon have also done so.

Explore one of the many beautifully written characters in this show by reading: 33 Mike Ehrmantraut Quotes from 'Breaking Bad' and 'Better Call Saul'.