38 Red Forman 'Foot' Quotes and More from the Hilarious 'That ‘70s Show'

"That ‘70s Show" became one of the best sitcoms of its time thanks to the different characters that perfectly complement each other. Among the fan-favorite roles is Red Forman, a strict yet comical dad to a nerdy sarcastic teen.

"That '70s Show" successfully ran for eight seasons from 1998 to 2006, jumpstarting the career of several actors and actresses. Set in the '70s, the coming-of-age series followed the lives of teenage friends, their challenges, triumphs, and comical conversations in Wisconsin.

Red Forman is among the characters that contributed to the show's success, playing a hilarious American dad. As a war veteran, he became a tough disciplinarian in his home. However, his stern personality, mixed with his incredible sense of humor, created one of the most known sitcom fathers in show business.

Often, his conversations with his son, Eric Forman, made audiences laugh and produced the best Red Forman quotes on "That '70s Show." Forman was wonderfully portrayed by actor Kurtwood Smith. However, it was originally offered to Chuck Norris.

Red Forman's quote from "That '70s Show:" "Well, that’s perfect, Eric. Use that line when you’re up for Miss America.” | Source: AmoDays

Red Forman's Best Burns on "That '70s Show"

"All right, sleep tight, and don't let the bedbugs put their foot in your [expletive.]" – Red Forman, "That ‘70s Show"

"Responsible people don't go around getting their nipples twisted." – Red Forman, "That ‘70s Show"

"Without our government, you'd be stuck in Siberia now, sucking the juice from a rotten commie potato." – Red Forman, "That ‘70s Show"

"Well, that's perfect, Eric. Use that line when you're up for Miss America." – Red Forman, "That ‘70s Show"

"That's your brain trying to comprehend its own stupidity." – Red Forman, "That ‘70s Show"

Red Forman's quote from "That '70s Show:" "Right. Now I’m gonna eat this steak, but first, I’m gonna make a birthday wish. Here it is: I wish everyone would shut up!" | Source: AmoDays

"So you're too proud to take her back? And what do you have to be so proud of? You're not an athlete. The only smart thing about you is your mouth, and just look at you." – Red Forman, "That ‘70s Show"

"Right. Now I'm gonna eat this steak, but first, I'm gonna make a birthday wish. Here it is: I wish everyone would shut up!" – Red Forman, "That ‘70s Show"

Red Forman Quotes on "That '70s Show" That are Absolutely Hilarious

"It might… I just had a heart attack." – Red Forman, "That ‘70s Show"

"If I was a bird, I'd fly into a ceiling fan." – Red Forman, "That ‘70s Show"

Red Forman's quote from "That '70s Show:" “All I did was scratch your mother’s shoes. I didn’t pull her pants down in front of God and the foreign kid.” | Source: AmoDays

"Ooh! Eric's in a fight! No one's here! No one's gonna believe me! Why didn't I bring my camera?" – Red Forman, "That ‘70s Show"

"All I did was scratch your mother's shoes. I didn't pull her pants down in front of God and the foreign kid." – Red Forman, "That ‘70s Show"

"Oh, would you stop! Luke Skywalker this, Luke Skywalker that, I'm sick and tired of hearing about that little fruit!" – Red Forman, "That ‘70s Show"

"Yelling is the only part of being a father that I enjoy!" – Red Forman, "That ‘70s Show"

"Why is our house always infested with kids?" – Red Forman, "That ‘70s Show"

Red Forman's quote from "That '70s Show:" “This isn’t food – this is what food eats!" | Source: AmoDays

"I just wanna say… when my time comes, I want to be buried face down." – Red Forman, "That ‘70s Show"

"This isn't food – this is what food eats!" – Red Forman, "That ‘70s Show"

"Happy Birthday. You know, the lawn's not gonna cut itself." – Red Forman, "That ‘70s Show"

"You know all that rent money you've been giving us? I've been putting it all in a bank account for your college fees… or bail." – Red Forman, "That ‘70s Show"

Red Forman's quote from "That '70s Show:" “If I was a bird, I’d fly into a ceiling fan.” | Source: AmoDays

"I'm gonna kill you and mount your head on the T.V.! And if it helps me get better reception, it will do more for me than you have ever done in your life!" – Red Forman, "That ‘70s Show"

"Okay Eric, I'm sorry I took your money... while I clothe you, and feed you, and put a roof over your head. Sorry." – Red Forman, "That ‘70s Show"

"Red: You can hit him in the groin.

Bob: You can hit him in the groin with a banjo." – "That ‘70s Show"

Red: Steven! What the hell's the matter with you? Stealing my cable!

Hyde: Red, before you blow your stack, why don't you take a look at that car wash girl? She is so sudsy.

Red: You drilled a hole in my floor. My foot is about to drill a hole in your [expletive]! – "That ‘70s Show"

"I was driving home from the plant and I saw the water tower. It looked like it was giving me the finger." – Red Forman, "That ‘70s Show"

"Kelso, you make Eric look like Einstein." – Red Forman, "That ‘70s Show"

Red Forman's quote from "That '70s Show:" “We’re all gonna go to church, and we’re gonna have a damn nice Sunday.” | Source: AmoDays

"Thanks for the help. You seem to have a natural talent for handling luggage." – Red Forman, "That ‘70s Show"

"We're all gonna go to church, and we're gonna have a damn nice Sunday." – Red Forman, "That ‘70s Show"

Red Forman's Dialogues with His Son

"Eric: What's so Belgian about them?

Red: They crumbled at the hands of the nazis." – "That ‘70s Show"

"Eric: Donna's in the kitchen; I need you to get rid of her for me.

Red: Do I have to be nice about it?

Eric: No.

Red: This is the happiest day of my life!" – "That ‘70s Show"

Red Forman's quote from "That '70s Show:" “Eric: Hey, Dad. Can I talk to you for a sec? Do you think that Hyde can stay for dinner? Red: Eric, again? I can't afford to feed your friend. I can't even afford to feed you, but the law requires me to!”| Source: AmoDays

"Eric: Look at him. He's magnificent. He's the king of the forest, just like... Bambi's dad. It's beautiful.

Red: (takes out the deer) Yeah, and I bet he tastes beautiful, too. Oh, and just for the record, Eric, I'm the king of the forest." – "That ‘70s Show"

"Red: Have you been in bed all day?

Red: You have got to be the laziest non-Communist I've ever met. And you are about to read a book that my foot wrote. It's called On The Road To In Your [expletive.]" – "That ‘70s Show"

"Eric Forman: I don't want to wake up in five years and hate my life.

Red: That's unavoidable." – "That ‘70s Show"

Red Forman Quotes That Prove He Is Also Loving

"Steven, I've come to think of you as a son. So I want to give you some honest, heartfelt advice." – Red Forman, "That ‘70s Show"

"I love that woman with a fiery passion... that consumes my soul!" – Red Forman, "That ‘70s Show"

"Donna's such a sweet kid. How could you do this to her?" – Red Forman, "That ‘70s Show"

"Listen, I'm gonna give you a few days to pull yourself together. You could stay in bed, watch TV, whatever you need to do." – Red Forman, "That ‘70s Show"

Red Forman's quote from "That '70s Show:" "Listen, I'm gonna give you a few days to pull yourself together. You could stay in bed, watch TV, whatever you need to do." | Source: AmoDays

Throughout its run, "That '70s Show" landed several Primetime Emmy nominations, of which it won once. The show's success can be attributed to those who worked in front of and behind the scenes, including Mila Kunis, Ashton Kutcher, Smith, Danny Masterson, Laura Prepon, Topher Grace, and more.

Those who enjoyed watching Red on "That '70s Show" may also like quotes from the sitcom "American Dad," which have similar humor.