32 Mr. Krabs Quotes for the Power-Hungry Businessman

Bikini Bottom's most successful restaurant owner, Mr. Krabs, is determined to make money no matter what. In his quest to keep his restaurant profitable, he says some whacky, funny, and sometimes heartfelt things. Here are 32 of the best Mr. Krabs quotes for you to enjoy.

Bikini Bottom’s favorite restaurant owner, Mr. Krabs, is similar to many business owners you may have come across. Ambitious, clever, and sometimes stingy, he has run the successful Krusty Krab for a long time.

Krabs is obsessed with money and dislikes spending it, but will go to great lengths to make Pearl happy. These conflicting wishes make for hilarious dialogues with his daughter and hilarious exchanges with his employees, Squidward and SpongeBob.

Mr. Krabs also has to spend a considerable amount of time keeping his secret Krabby Patty formula from the power-hungry Plankton, who runs a competing and much less successful restaurant, the Chum Bucket.

If you are in need of a few chuckles, here are quotes from Bikini Bottom’s most successful restaurant owner, Mr. Krabs.

Mr. Krabs's quote: "Nay, I could never harm the lad. His absence has taught me that much. And I'm not just talking about the money I'm losing with him gone." | Image: AmoDays

MR. KRABS QUOTES ABOUT MONEY

"Here’s that paycheck I owe ya, plus a bonus. Well, here’s your paycheck anyway." — Mr. Krabs

"Oh, yes, you do, no world means no money, so, either save the world, or you're fired!" — Mr. Krabs

"If I don't make any money today, I'll surely break out in a rash!" — Mr. Krabs

"You come with me on the date and don't let me spend any money. Now, remember, we keep it cheap by going to the park. And no matter how much I ask you, you don't give me any of me money. Now give me a dollar." — Mr. Krabs

"We had an agreement, boy. You ain't supposed to spend any of me money!" — Mr. Krabs

Mr. Krabs's quote: "Here’s that paycheck I owe ya, plus a bonus. Well, here’s your paycheck anyway." | Image: AmoDays

"Cheer up? How can I cheer up... when you're spending all me hard-earned cash?!" — Mr. Krabs

"Counting my money. Money sweeter than honey. Money money this, money money that. Profit will make me wallet fat!" — Mr. Krabs

"The money is always right!" — Mr. Krabs

"What the devil fish is going on out here?! Time is money! And if you boys are wasting time, then you're wasting money! And that's just sick!" — Mr. Krabs

"I can think of 10 good reasons to never let go of a dime." — Mr. Krabs

Mr. Krabs's quote:"Oh, yes you do, no world means no money, so, either save the world, or you're fired!" | Image: AmoDays

"It's money that paid for all them renovations we did! Oh, nothing in all the seven seas could matter more. Not even that... Hmm?...scrumptious, curvy cutie." — Mr. Krabs

"I don't get it. If a free salad bar won't bring in new customers... what will?" — Mr. Krabs

"Congratulations, sir! You have just given me my one-millionth dollar!" — Mr. Krabs

"I was five years old and my father gave me a dollar. I loved that dollar. Loved it like a brother. Me and that dollar went everywhere together." — Mr. Krabs

"A 5 letter word for happiness — MONEY." — Mr. Krabs

Mr. Krabs's quote: "Well, the way I see it, there are three possibilities: One, you stole it; two, you stole it; or three, you stole it!" | Image: AmoDays

SARCASTIC OR OFF-HANDED MR. KRABS QUOTES

"What doesn't kill you, usually succeeds in the second attempt." — Mr. Krabs

“Yeah? I used to have a kidney stone. Everything passes eventually." — Mr. Krabs

"What's this 'we' stuff? You fed him the tainted patty. Looks like it's the stony lonesome for you!" — Mr. Krabs

"Give to the Children's Fund? What have the children ever done for me?" — Mr. Krabs

Mr. Krabs's quote: "What doesn't kill you, usually succeeds in the second attempt." | Image: AmoDays

MR. KRABS QUOTES TO AND ABOUT HIS EMPLOYEES

"That Plankton is a clever beast. You’ve got to keep a sharp eye out for him, SpongeBob." — Mr. Krabs

"Just go out there and give him what he needs. Pour on the charm. Sweet talk him." — Mr. Krabs

"Nay, I could never harm the lad. His absence has taught me that much. And I'm not just talking about the money I'm losing with him gone." — Mr. Krabs

"Well, the way I see it, there are three possibilities: One, you stole it; two, you stole it; or three, you stole it!" — Mr. Krabs

"This nose can smell laziness for up to 10,000 leagues! … I’ll give you a break you’ll not soon forget!" — Mr. Krabs

Mr. Krabs's quote: "What's this 'we' stuff? You fed him the tainted patty. Looks like it's the stony lonesome for you!" | Image: AmoDays

"Ah, SpongeBob, you wouldn't last even one day in the wild. This is your natural habitat. This is your wide open range. These are your amber waves. And this oh, this is your golden scepter, with which you rule! That's better than nasty old jellyfish, right, SpongeBob?" — Mr. Krabs

"A blood nose, eh? Do ya think I was born yesterday? He doesn't even have a nose. Get back to work all of you! I’m not running a happy factory here." — Mr. Krabs

"One of everything?! Whoopee! I love Bubble Buddy! Squidward, show our best customer to his table." — Mr. Krabs

OTHER MR. KRABS QUOTES TO MAKE YOU CHUCKLE

"Listen here, ya little barnacle. No one and I means no one can ever know about this. It'll be the end of you, it'll be the end of me. And worst of all, it'll be the end of me!" — Mr. Krabs

Mr. Krabs's quote: "Just go out there and give him what he needs. Pour on the charm. Sweet talk him." | Image: AmoDays

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"That sounded like hatch doors. Do you smell it? That smell. A kind of smelly smell." — Mr. Krabs

"Don't blame yourself, boy. No friendship can withstand the allure of a Krabby Patty. Now, let's go back to the Krusty Krab and have a fresh one, on me." — Mr. Krabs

"Well, if I was a robot, which I’m not, at least I’m well put together." — Mr. Krabs

"Listen, instead of killing yourselves, I've got something really important for you to do for me. Now, are you men ready for your super...special....secret....assignment?" — Mr. Krabs

Mr. Krabs's quote: "That Plankton is a clever beast. You’ve got to keep a sharp eye out for him, SpongeBob." | Image: AmoDays

When many of us think of Mr. Krabs’ undying love for money, we probably have a few people that come to mind who share that same love. But we have to admit, Mr. Krabs works hard for his success, and that's an admirable quality.

His love for his daughter and girlfriend, Mrs. Puff, is sweet to watch and adds dimension to his typically greedy and stingy personality. Whether you love him or despise him, Bikini Bottom is that much better for having Mr. Krabs around.

If you loved these quotes, you'll enjoy these 60 SpongeBob quotes that every adult can relate to.