40 Tim Allen Quotes from the ‘Home Improvement’ Star on Cars, Life and Acting

Tim Allen is an actor, voiceover artist, and author. But beyond his professional life, he has much to say about men, his personal life, and a bit about work here and there. Learn more by reading his 40 quotes below.

Although he studied radio production and television at University, Tim Allen's career began with a dare. Taking his comedy chops to Detroit's Comedy Castle after a friend's provocation, he soon soared into the limelight.

He has since been in many productions as an actor and done voiceovers such as Buzz Lightyear in the first two "Toy Story's." Of course, his career and general fame as a performer are mainly attributed to his role as Tom from "Home Improvement."

He has won many awards over the years, including but not limited to the TV Land Award for Fan Favorite as well as the Peoples Choice Award for Favorite Male Performer In New Television Series.

Get to know him even better by reading 40 of his quotes below.

An image of Tim Allen, with his quote: “A real man knows that there no substitute for support, encouragement or a pit crew.”┃Source: Getty Images

Funny and Insightful Quotes on Men and Cars

“Real men don’t use instructions, son. Besides, this is just the manufacturer’s opinion on how to put this together.” ― Tim Allen

“Men often do things for women that they don’t want to do, so that women will do things for men that they don’t want to do.” ― Tim Allen

“Women now have choices. They can be married, not married, have a job, not have a job, be married with children, unmarried with children. Men have the same choice we’ve always had: work, or prison.” ― Tim Allen

“All men like to think that they can do it alone, but a real man knows that there no substitute for support, encouragement or a pit crew.” ― Tim Allen

"To get a man's attention, just stand in front of the TV and don't move. He'll talk to you. I promise." ― Tim Allen

An image of Tim Allen, with his quote: “Men are pigs. Too bad we own everything.” ┃Source: Getty Images

“But separate a man from his car...that’s inhuman.” ― Tim Allen

“A guy knows he's in love when he loses interest in his car for a couple of days.” ― don

“Men are pigs. Too bad we own everything.” ― Tim Allen

“I think women like Ferraris. A Ferrari is everybody's car.” ― Tim Allen

Pondering on Life Quotes

"The greatest missile in the world is useless...unless it's targeted. A torpedo is adrift unless it has someplace to go. An arrow is pointless unless it hits something. So it's important for kids, for everyone, even if you fail at first, to target something and head in that direction. With all your might." ― Tim Allen

An image of Tim Allen, with his quote: “When somebody tells you they're not very smart, they're saying exactly the opposite.”┃Source: Getty Images

"You don't know what people are really like until they're under a lot of stress." ― Tim Allen

"Man is the only animal to borrow tools." ― Tim Allen

"Be wary of listening to stories secondhand." ― Tim Allen

“If you don't decide where you're going, life will decide for you.” ― Tim Allen

"I don't understand why it has to be either, or. Either socialism or democracy. Why can't we combine things to get the best of each system?" ― Tim Allen

An image of Tim Allen, with his quote: “In marriage, compromise nurtures the relationship.”┃Source: Getty Images

“When somebody tells you they're not very smart, they're saying exactly the opposite.” ― Tim Allen

“If it ain’t broke, you can probably still fix it.” ― Tim Allen

“The world’s a mean place. It’s unfair, then it’s fair. It’s hateful; then it’s loving...It’s a very peculiar place on philosophical and metaphysical and religious levels.” ― Tim Allen

“In marriage, compromise nurtures the relationship.” ― Tim Allen

"If you want to condemn yourself for the mistakes you've made, let's be fair; that means you've got to congratulate yourself for all the good things you've done. It's okay to say, "God, I wish I'd done this; yeah, but I did do that." Then it kind of balances out." ― Tim Allen

An image of Tim Allen, with his quote: “The world’s a mean place. It’s unfair, then it’s fair. It’s hateful; then it’s loving." ┃Source: Getty Images

Quotes on His Professional & Personal Experiences

“I blend memories. I blend them into one that’s funny. I exaggerate to clarify.” ― Tim Allen

"It's true; I have a skill, and it's... it has not related to acting, it's not related to auditions, it's not related to studios, not related to public whim. It's whether I'm funny or not and whether I can entertain people." ― Tim Allen

“Comedy is the ultimate anarchist.” ― Tim Allen

"I do a lot of family shows." ― Tim Allen

"I have an only child. She's so independent and good with adults." ― Tim Allen

An image of Tim Allen, with his quote: “Comedy is the ultimate anarchist.”┃Source: Getty Images

"The big advantage to playing the Venetian in Las Vegas - where it's a beautiful theater - is that, unlike other places, even many other nice venues, I can do a set and lighting cues, I can put on a real show. I can dress up, wear a tux." ― Tim Allen

"Nothing's as easy as it is on a sitcom. Issues that we take care of in 20 minutes on the show can stretch out over years in real families." ― Tim Allen

“I’m a very bad student, but a great learner.” ― Tim Allen

"I'm a creative guy, artistically with graphics." ― Tim Allen

"I have a thing for tools." ― Tim Allen

An image of Tim Allen, with his quote: “I’m a very bad student, but a great learner.”┃Source: Getty Images

"I have to get a licence to drive a motorcycle to protect myself and the people around me. I am adamant there should be some sort of licensing required to have children." ― Tim Allen

“I have irrational fears, and they all go back to losing my father as a kid.” ― Tim Allen

More Tim Allen Quotes

"Anytime you work with animals, you begin to see more humanity in them." ― Tim Allen

"Dogs will eat till they die. Cats will leave food in the dish, incomprehensible to a dog." ― Tim Allen

An image of Tim Allen, with his quote: “Can we take a direct flight back to reality, or do we have to change planes in Denver?”┃Source: Getty Images

"In my experience, it's all wonderful with girls until about 16. Around that time, boys kind of calm down and start focusing their testosterone. Girls get a little challenging, especially for fathers." ― Tim Allen

“Use a screwdriver instead of a hammer. Try to untighten the nut with your hand. Utilize the path of least resistance first.” ― Tim Allen

“Electricity can be dangerous. My nephew tried to stick a penny into a plug. Whoever said a penny doesn’t go far didn’t see him shoot across that floor. I told him he was grounded.” ― Tim Allen

An image of Tim Allen, with his quote: “I think women like Ferraris. A Ferrari is everybody's car.”┃Source: Getty Images

Allen has worked alongside Hollywood stars such as Pamela Anderson, Tom Hanks, Joan Cusack, Sigourney Weaver, Sam Rockwell, and the late Alan Rickman.

Continue getting to know Tinseltown royalty by reading: 65 Jamie Lee Curtis Quotes: Inspiring Wisdom and Fearless Authenticity.