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A Photo of Titus Andromedon with the Quote, "It Is Just One of the Many Small Ways in Which I Am Stronger than Beyoncé." | Source: YOUTUBE/Netflix
A Photo of Titus Andromedon with the Quote, "It Is Just One of the Many Small Ways in Which I Am Stronger than Beyoncé." | Source: YOUTUBE/Netflix

25 Titus Andromedon Quotes from the Hilarious 'Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt'

Akhona Zungu
May 24, 2023
01:00 P.M.
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Titus Andromedon may be the best friend of the title character in the bizarre comedy show, "Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt," but he built his own sizeable fanbase as the flamboyant and aspirational but not-so-driven artist.

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Despite beginning with a rather grave circumstance, "Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt" was an unforgettable comedy series packed with the most bizarre situations and the worst people to deal with them.

The story begins with Kimmy, one girl among four, who was led to believe she was one of the few survivors of a nuclear apocalypse. She spent 15 years in an underground bunker isolated from a world that hadn't ended and continued evolving.

Eventually, she and her bunkmates were rescued, and she had to start life all over again in New York City, but, thankfully, she wasn't alone; Kimmy found a new best friend, the fabulous Titus Andromedon.

With a self-assuredness that was the envy of Beyoncé, the aspirations of a star, and the unrelenting laziness of a bed, Andromedon always stole the show. Take a trip down memory lane into some of his funniest and most self-ironic quotes below.

A photo of Titus Andromedon with the quote, "Dream inspired by true events" | Source: YouTube/Netflix

A photo of Titus Andromedon with the quote, "Dream inspired by true events" | Source: YouTube/Netflix

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Titus Andromedon Quotes That Show How Fabulous He Is

"Oh my sweet fancy Jesus, I'm a star! You're all dead to me." ― Titus Andromedon

"But I already did something today." ― Titus Andromedon

"It is just one of the many small ways in which I am stronger than Beyoncé." ― Titus Andromedon

"I once went to an open audition and it was just a bum fight." ― Titus Andromedon

"Dream inspired by true events." ― Titus Andromedon

A photo of Titus Andromedon with the quote, "I envy you. I've never been able to meet me." | Source: YouTube/Netflix

A photo of Titus Andromedon with the quote, "I envy you. I've never been able to meet me." | Source: YouTube/Netflix

"Imagine a world where everyone shared my sense of fabulousness. There'd be no more war, no more famine, no more stupid polo shirts where the horse is like the whole shirt." ― Titus Andromedon

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"Stupid Kimmy. I don't give up on everything that I… whatever." ― Titus Andromedon

"Go away, Lillian. I've decided to live as a bed from now on." ― Titus Andromedon

"I envy you. I've never been able to meet me." ― Titus Andromedon

Titus Andromedon Quotes Filled with Self-Irony

"I'm an actor, I can act like I got strong." ― Titus Andromedon

A photo of Titus Andromedon with the quote, "I am a prickly gay man. And not just because I fell into a cactus while stealing apples from a botanical garden."  | Source: YouTube/Netflix

A photo of Titus Andromedon with the quote, "I am a prickly gay man. And not just because I fell into a cactus while stealing apples from a botanical garden." | Source: YouTube/Netflix

"Black, gay, and old? I'm not gonna know which box to check on the hate crime form." — Titus Andromedon

"You know how I'm like an astronaut? I'm out of this world." — Titus Andromedon

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"I am a prickly gay man. And not just because I fell into a cactus while stealing apples from a botanical garden." — Titus Andromedon

"I should have been a doctor. I look amazing in white, my handwriting is terrible, and I love telling people to take their pants off and just leaving and then making them sit there for an hour." — Titus Andromedon

"I'm a flamingo because I’m delicate, colorful, and often stand on one leg due to a planter's wart." — Titus Andromedon

A photo of Titus Andromedon with the quote, "Look at me. Talented. Dashing. Transcending. But no career and no agent. And just the one sock." | Source: YouTube/Netflix

A photo of Titus Andromedon with the quote, "Look at me. Talented. Dashing. Transcending. But no career and no agent. And just the one sock." | Source: YouTube/Netflix

"Ugh, that crown I got for being prom king was so tacky I hardly even wear it anymore." — Titus Andromedon

"Look at me. Talented. Dashing. Transcending. But no career and no agent. And just the one sock." — Titus Andromedon

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Titus Andromedon Quotes from the Most Hilarious Scenes

"I'm the one who'll have to “Queer Eye” that bridge and tunnel tadpole. I can't take on a project like that. I'm just one man. That show had five guys. Speaking of five guys, I want a hamburger." — Titus Andromedon

"I decided to give all my Barbies perms. Some of them don’t have the face for it." — Titus Andromedon

"Isn't that a good thing? I mean, you get twice as much sword. Who would want a single-edged sword?" — Titus Andromedon

A photo of Titus Andromedon with the quote, "Girl, you need to stop, drop and roll. By which I mean stop talking, drop the subject, and get me a cinnamon roll." | Source: YouTube/Netflix

A photo of Titus Andromedon with the quote, "Girl, you need to stop, drop and roll. By which I mean stop talking, drop the subject, and get me a cinnamon roll." | Source: YouTube/Netflix

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"Like 'snowbesity.' It's when you don't know if someone is fat or not because they're wearing a winter coat." ― Titus Andromedon

"This musical is going to be a lop. Which is a flop which couldn't give an F." ― Titus Andromedon

"Numbers, the most boring of all the shapes." ― Titus Andromedon

"Girl, you need to stop, drop and roll. by which I mean stop talking, drop the subject, and get me a cinnamon roll." ― Titus Andromedon

A photo of Titus Andromedon with the quote, "Don't thank her, you are rich now, and rich people can do whatever we want." | Source: YouTube/Netflix

A photo of Titus Andromedon with the quote, "Don't thank her, you are rich now, and rich people can do whatever we want." | Source: YouTube/Netflix

Andromedon may have had an unbreakable confidence in "Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt" — where Tina Fey and Sam Page also appeared — but he had a blunt honesty that he sometimes applied even to himself. That honesty brought him down to earth and made him loveable to many viewers. The man could be quite frank, just like Dennis Reynolds in "It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia."

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