36 Luke Danes Quotes: Gruff Yet Golden-Hearted ‘Gilmore Girls’ Diner Guy

Explore an assortment of 36 memorable quotes from Luke Danes, the gruff yet endearing diner owner of Stars Hollow, in the beloved series "Gilmore Girls."

The small town of Stars Hollow comes to life with its unique charm and eccentric residents in the classic "Gilmore Girls" show. At the heart of this beloved series is Luke Danes, whose character embodies a captivating blend of grumpiness and endearing qualities.

Danes, the owner of the local diner, is a central figure in Stars Hollow, having grown up in the town he calls home. Taking over his father's hardware store and transforming it into his bustling diner, Luke carries with him a mix of protectiveness, skepticism, and unexpected warmth that has endeared him to fans worldwide.

While navigating the quirks of his tight-knit community, Luke grapples with his longing for privacy and independence in a town that thrives on gossip and close-knit relationships. Through his complex journey, Luke's character evolves, revealing layers of vulnerability and loyalty that make him more than just a gruff exterior.

Within the series, Luke's interactions with the show's ensemble cast, including Lorelai and Rory Gilmore, offer poignant moments, sharp wit, and heartfelt exchanges that resonate with viewers. Join us as we delve into a collection of 36 quotes, capturing the essence of Luke Danes and his indelible impact on the endearing world of "Gilmore Girls."

Luke Danes, with his quote:“Don’t add stuff from your to-do list to my to-do list.” |Source: facebook.com/GilmoreGirls

Luke Danes Quotes: Wisdom and Opinions

“Oh, Jess, come on. You did this completely wrong. Open two-way communication is the foundation of love, and you cut that off. I had this friend — let’s call him Phillip — who thought expressing intimacy was a favor to his partner, but expressions of intimacy should be given freely and frequently. He loved Judy, but he used his love as a bargaining tool.” — Luke Danes

“Have any of you considered the fact that you’re glorifying a war we fought so we could keep land that we stole?” — Luke Danes

"Tradition is a trap that allows people to stick their head in the sand." — Luke Danes

“Please, there is no fate. There is no fate. There is no destiny.” — Luke Danes

“Don’t add stuff from your to-do list to my to-do list.” — Luke Danes

Luke Danes, with his quote: “When you have expectations, they… you will get disappointed.” |Source: facebook.com/GilmoreGirls

“Did you know that golf courses are an environmental blight because of the chemicals they use to keep the grass green?” — Luke Danes

“You could have witnessed something good for your mother who, yes, has screwed up a bit in her life but now seems to have found something to make her happy, and you miss that, you refuse to be a part of that, you are going to be very sorry.” — Luke Danes

“Lawyers waste time and money. They’re needless middlemen who slither into people’s lives when they’re at their most vulnerable so they can clamp on and suck like leeches until everyone, but them is distraught and penniless.” — Luke Danes

“When you have expectations, they… you will get disappointed.” — Luke Danes

Luke Danes, with his quote: “Lawyers waste time and money. They’re needless middlemen.” | Source: facebook.com/GilmoreGirls

"What you’re doing right there with the books, very good." — Luke Danes

Luke Danes Quotes Filled with Negativity

"Crazy people. The whole town should be medicated and put in a rec room with ping-pong tables and hand puppets." — Luke Danes

“Parking! How can people ask [for] a monthly fee for a parking space? I mean, they’re making money off your tent, off your utilities, when you use their coin-operated washer and dryer! That’s cash, directly in their pocket. And by the way, it’s not even that good of a parking space — it’s out in the open under one of those trees that drops the sap on your car that eats away your paint. And who is going to pay for my car, huh? Where’s my $500 paint-killing-tree-sap deposit!?” — Luke Danes

“It's so good to have someone to share this hate with.” — Luke Danes

“I don’t want a wood-burning fireplace, but if I take an apartment with a wood-burning fireplace, even though I could give a rat’s [expletive] about a wood-burning fireplace, I have to pay an extra $200 a month for the wood-burning fireplace. And three of the places make you put down a $500 deposit if you have a dog. Can you believe this?” — Luke Danes

Luke Danes, with his quote: “It's so good to have someone to share this hate with.” |Source: facebook.com/GilmoreGirls

“I’m fine. I’m great. It’s a big, fat, happy sunshine day for me.” — Luke Danes

"Everything in the past was so quaint, so charming. Times were simpler. Kids didn’t have sex. Neighbors knew each other. It’s a freaking fairytale. Things sucked then, too. It just sucked without indoor plumbing.” — Luke Danes

"Get that coffee out of here." — Luke Danes

Funny Luke Danes Quotes

"My blood sugar's low. I'll eat an apple and get back to you." — Luke Danes

Luke Danes, with his quote: “I can clear the counter, and you can play some bagel hockey.” | Source: facebook.com/GilmoreGirls

"Hands in the air! I want to see hands in the air!" — Luke Danes

"Finish up. We’ll hold hands and skip afterwards." — Luke Danes

“Violent pencil tossing usually signals the need for pie.” — Luke Danes

“I can clear the counter, and you can play some bagel hockey.” — Luke Danes

Luke Danes, with his quote: “Violent pencil tossing usually signals the need for pie.” |Source: facebook.com/GilmoreGirls

More Luke Danes Quotes

“Life. I’ve lived." — Luke Danes

"I've just been living alone since... forever." — Luke Danes

"You have a problem." — Luke Danes

"It’s not your fault. It’s not my fault. It’s just, we’re not right together, you know? You’re you, I’m me. I just want to stop pretending we’re something else." — Luke Danes

"You won't like it." — Luke Danes

Luke Danes, with his quote: "Nope. Can't sit here. Three people got nailed in the head here..." |Source: facebook.com/GilmoreGirls

“You don’t buy a car based on a feeling. Sports cars don’t think they’re better than other cars, okay? Hatchbacks don’t have SUV inferiority complexes. And sedans aren’t afraid to get dirty.” — Luke Danes

"Rory, how much do you like this person?" — Luke Danes

Luke Danes, with his quote: "I just want you to know I'm in...I am all in." | Source: facebook.com/GilmoreGirls

"When did you punch a hole in your nose?" — Luke Danes

"Nope. Can't sit here. Three people got nailed in the head here..." – Luke Danes

"I just want you to know I'm in...I am all in." — Luke Danes

Luke Danes, with his quote: “I’m fine. I’m great. It’s a big, fat, happy sunshine day for me.” | Source: facebook.com/GilmoreGirls

Danes is portrayed by Scott Patterson, alongside the power duo Rory, played by Alexis Bledel, and her mother, Lauren Graham. Two performers who were part of the show, Milo Ventimiglia and Melissa McCarthy, have stepped back into the limelight in recent years.

Melissa McCarthy continues to make waves, recently playing Ursula in the Live Action "The Little Mermaid."

Milo Ventimiglia made a heartfelt impact when he played the deeply beloved father, Jack Pearson, alongside Mandy Moore in the heartstopping series "This Is Us."

Find out more about his character in "Gilmore Girls," by reading 34 of Jess Mariano's quotes.