40 Funny Psych Quotes — Two Besties With a Sense Of Humor Solving Crimes

"Psych" is a television show that has murders being solved through psychic abilities, sort of. Although a serious genre, there is an abundance of humor.

"Psych" is a mystery crime drama series that follows two best friends, Shawn Spencer and Burton "Gus" Guster, who are detectives. The dynamic duo solves complicated crimes through Shawn's somewhat psychic abilities, which are, in fact, exceptional observational skills.

This makes for some fun storylines as he and Gus journey through their detective work trying to find clues to different cases – leading to some hilarious dialogue. Read 40 Funny Psych quotes that are uproarious.

Shawn Spencer's quote: "I can't help being a gorgeous friend. It's just the card I drew." | Source: youtube.com/Psych

Funny Psych Quotes from Shawn Spencer

"I don't lose things. I place things in locations which later elude me." — Shawn Spencer

"Take pictures. Not of sights. Don't take pictures of buildings. Take pictures of moments, because that’s what matters." — Shawn Spencer

"What isn't clear is why people always say 'goes without saying,' yet still feel compelled to say the thing that was supposed to go without saying. Doesn’t that bother you?" — Shawn Spencer

"Just because you put syrup on something doesn’t make it a pancake." — Shawn Spencer

"How can you tell that someone's a compulsive liar? I mean, assuming that their pants aren’t on fire." — Shawn Spencer

Shawn Spencer's quote: "Gus Don't Be Harry Potter And The Prisoner of Marzipan." | Source: youtube.com/Psych

"Well, the plot, unlike your hair, continues to thicken." — Shawn Spencer

"I can't help being a gorgeous friend. It’s just the card I drew." — Shawn Spencer

"Note to self: be rich one day." — Shawn Spencer

"I'm having a clear vision on a cloudy day." — Shawn Spencer

"Remember Dad, you treat a woman like a person, then a princess, then a Greek goddess, then a person again." — Shawn Spencer

Gus' quote: "He can't die in there, Shawn. It's a company car." | Source: youtube.com/Psych

"My dad is a lying liar from Liarsburg!" — Shawn Spencer

"I've heard it both ways." — Shawn Spencer

"My assistant is a Golden Retriever, adorable but dim. Her whole keyboard is just three big buttons. She has very large paws. I should have fired her years ago but she's a rescue and I didn't have the heart." — Shawn Spencer

"Please. I haven't snuck into your apartment for weeks. Which reminds me, you're all out of peanut butter." — Shawn Spencer

Shawn Spencer's quote: "Just because you put syrup on something doesn't make it a pancake." | Source: youtube.com/Psych

Funny Psych Quotes from Shawn Spencer

"Gus wants to know if your boat has cable. It's the season finale of 'Leverage' and his TiVo's on the fritz." — Shawn Spencer

"Only What We Learned From The Fast And The Furious. So Everything." — Shawn and Gus

"Gus Don’t Be Harry Potter And The Prisoner Of Marzipan." — Shawn

"I Lived In An Airport Terminal For A Month." "That Was Tom Hanks In The Terminal." — Shawn and Gus

"Younger? Who do you think she's meeting with, Justin Bieber?" — Burton

"Well, much like Lady Gaga, I was born this way." — Shawn Spencer

"Sorry I was too busy James Bonding it up here." — Shawn Spencer

Shawn Spencer's quote: "Note to self: be rich one day." | Source: youtube.com/Psych

Funny Psych Quotes from Burton Gus

"I'm nobody’s pawn, Shawn. I’m a Queen." — Burton

"Man, I'm nobody's charity case. I demand I dig my own grave!" — Burton

"She needs Jesus." — Gus

"What would you do if that was Jesus' yogurt?" — Gus

"I've been murdered." — Gus

"I've never been murdered before! It's liberating." — Gus

Shawn Spencer's quote: "My dad is a lying liar from Liarsburg!" | Source: youtube.com/Psych

"That's how I knock." — Gus

"Trying to shed tears for Lassie. They won't come and I’m ashamed." — Gus

"I may not be the best judge because all you people look alike to me but even though he is shockingly close, I don't believe he’s an exact match." — Gus

"This dude has a strange relationship with the postal service." — Gus

"He can't die in there, Shawn. It's a company car." — Gus

"I get productive when I'm nervous." — Burton

Shawn Spencer's quote: "Well, much like Lady Gaga, I was born this way." | Source: youtube.com/Psych

Best Psych Quotes from the Cast

"I am not going to stress over things that I can't control." — Gus

"I believe in making my woman my queen." — Gus

"Partners do not lie to each other, because partners put their lives in each other's hands." — Carlton Lassiter

"The truth is, I want to change, I need to change." — Shawn Spencer

"You brought a date to the crime scene?" — Lassiter

"I'm just saying, technology is way overrated." — Shawn Spencer

Burton's quote: "I'm nobody's pawn, Shawn. I'm a Queen." | Source: youtube.com/Psych

"Psych" is considered one of the most underrated comedy series of the 2000s, which also happens to be one of the most quotable. Thanks to its well-written script, the show has a great sense of humor and explores nail-biting crime-solving.

In the series, James Roday plays Shawn Spencer, Dule Hill, Gus, and Maggie Lawson, Juliet O'Hara. The show ran for eight seasons from 2006 to 2014, and in 2017, there was a cast reunion for "Psych: The Movie."

If you enjoyed reading quotes from this comedy show, read more funny ones from "39 Hilarious 'Superstore' Quotes." "Broad City" is also regarded as one of its kind in the comedy genre.